Merry Christmas
by Chakat StarDust
Summary: 'How could such a small, simple thing could tear through everything I ever believed in the space of an instant? You didn't know me, you didn't know what was coming next, and yet, you still changed everything.' How one small life can touch another.
1. Chapter 1

Wolf: I know, it's a little early for Christmas, but this little oneshot has been bugging me, so enjoy. Warning, slightly depressing. I own nothing!

Do you have any idea of what you've done to me? How such a small, simple thing could tear through everything I ever believed in the space of an instant? How could you? You didn't know me, you didn't know what was coming next, and yet, you still changed everything.

It was snowing. Christmas eve in Tokyo, all the people rushing home to imitate that famous Western holiday, pathetic really, trying to be like them, there's nothing wrong with the way things were before. People give me a wide berth as they rush about the busy downtown streets. I look in the glass in the neighbouring shop and see why; long dark hair, and scowling black eyes, I look like I'd kill someone as soon as look at them, which, I would.

Someone brushed against me and I turned with a snarl. It was you, and you weren't even paying attention to me. You were staring up at the falling snow, an expression of childish wonder in your blue-grey eyes as the flakes settled onto your hat and in your lashes. You cupped your hands more firmly around the hot chocolate in your hands, a rare indulgence for a broke university student.

Out of habit I looked into your thoughts, seeking your heart. You were happy, because you were going home that day, back to Canada, to be with your family for Christmas. Images of presents, food, and all the people that surround you in a comforting cocoon of love imprinted itself into my mind, making my own heart ache for the easy familiarity and reassurance of family. But I shook it off, I'm Hao Asakura, I don't need anyone.

Without me knowing it, you were noticing me for the first time. I felt your eyes take in my jeans and black trenchcoat. I wasn't wearing any gloves or a hat. It was cold, but I didn't care. It seemed you did though.

A soft nudge at my side made me look over at you again. Smiling shyly you held out the cup of hot chocolate that you hadn't really been able to afford, but bought anyways, just as a treat for yourself. For a moment I did nothing, but looking into your earnest eyes I knew there was only one thing I could do. I took the cup from you, feeling its warmth seep into my cold fingers.

I could find no way to say anything to you, so stunned I was that you would give up your rare indulgence for another.

"You need it more than I do." You said in answer to my unspoken question. "Merry Christmas." You whispered. The light changed and you walked away, heading across the street, heading home. I couldn't move, still completely taken aback by you. You turned for one last smile, and that was when the beautiful twilight was shattered.

Glass cracked and shots rang out from inside a nearby shop. Someone screamed as masked men ran out, still firing shots. I saw you frozen in the middle of the street, large eyes wide with fear, before you jerked back, blood spraying up from you as you fell.

The cup tumbled from my nerveless fingers, hot chocolate spilling in the snow as I ran into the street. I got to you first, pulling off my coat and placing it over the holes ripped into your stomach and chest, trying vainly to staunch the bleeding. Why was I doing this? Maybe it was the smile you gave me, or the hot chocolate that you so willingly gave a stranger. Whatever it was, I couldn't leave you there alone.

You gasped, staring up at me with frightened blue-grey eyes. Someone was screaming for an ambulance, but I knew just by looking at your torn up body and the amount of blood that you were losing that it would come too late. Looking into your eyes, I knew you knew it too. There was nothing to be done except stay by your side as you bled out in the cold.

A tear slid down your cheek, followed by another, and another. Fear, pain and grief mingled in those droplets falling from your eyes. You didn't want to die, you didn't want to have to say goodbye yet. You were going to see your family, why couldn't you see them one last time?

I took one of your hands in your own. Your skin was warm against the chill of my own. You grasped at my hand weakly like a life preserver. How could I reassure you that everything was going to be alright? How could I tell you that it wasn't an end but a beginning that you raced toward with every slowing beat of your heart?

"There's something even more beautiful than this waiting for you." I whispered softly to you, trying in vain to prepare you for what's ahead. "No more of the bad things in life, and in no time at all, the people you love will join you." I didn't know if I was comforting you or not, I'd never done this for anyone, never cared enough to do it.

I was so wrapped up in the pain that humans had caused me, so intent on making them suffer for their cruelty, that I forgot that they could get hurt too. I forgot that they could be just as scared, just as confused, just as vulnerable as I could be. I had also forgotten how kind they could be too, until you reminded me, and now you were being taken away. Life is too cruel sometimes.

Suddenly you smiled at me, a soft, peaceful smile. It was going to be alright, that smile seemed to say, as though I was the one that needed comfort instead of you. Your breaths came in unsteady, faltering gasps as your hand's grip on mine weakened more and more. Dimly I could hear sirens, but they seemed so far away. So cruel of fate to take you away from life without letting you say goodbye.

A babble of voices announced the arrival of the paramedics, but it was already too late. A soft sigh escaped your lips as your eyelids fluttered shut for the last time. Your still warm hand slipped from mine as your body simply became an empty shell, the soul gone.

Which brings me to now. Here I am, standing outside my brother's door on Christmas Eve, wondering how the hell I can expect him to welcome me in. But I don't know where else to go, my heart feels shattered, my mind, broken.

My body is warm though, because you've wrapped yourself around me. You stayed behind as they took your body away, your soul warming me as you whispered, urging me on. You want me to be with family, you know I need it, but I just don't think I can ring that doorbell.

You solve the problem for me however, by reaching out, using my arm to my surprise, and ringing the doorbell. I can feel your happiness inside me, but all I could feel was dull, aching sorrow for you and the life you will never get to live.

My thoughts are interrupted as the door opens and my brother, Yoh, peers out at me in surprise. Surprise that I am alive, surprise that I am standing there. I can't make a sound, no words escape my lips to explain why I am here, standing outside his door.

But Yoh just looks at me, out in the cold in only jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, my coat is long gone, and reaches out for my arm, to draw me inside. I can feel your joy inside me as you secure yourself around my heart for the time being.

Yoh says nothing as he leads me into the living room. Silence falls as Yoh's family and friends notice me. Yoh simply sits me down at the table, next to his spot and gets up again. I hang my head, unable to meet anyone's eyes. How can I? I've caused so much pain for these people, and never cared before, but you broke something inside me, and I can't stop caring.

A clink draws my eyes upward to the steaming mug of hot chocolate Yoh places in front of me before sitting down. The sight undoes me and the tears that I've held back fall as an image of your shy eyes as you hold your cup out comes to me, accompanied by one of your body bleeding in the street.

Stunned, no one moves as I break down. No one, except Yoh who reaches for me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders and pulling me close as I continue to sob. His hands are warm, just like yours. He whispers to me, reassuring me as one hand grasps mine. I grasp back just like you did in those last moments, seeking something to hang onto as your world collapsed around you.

Eventually I can stop and look up. The faces surrounding me are softer now, concern in some, wariness in other, curiosity in all. Yoh asks the question everyone else is afraid to ask, and, haltingly, I tell them about you.

"I don't think I can be forgiven." I finish, tears beginning to seep down my cheeks once more. "I'm not sure I can forgive myself. All I want is a second chance, to do things right. To have a family again." I whisper this last, hanging my head once more. How can I ever think that they would be willing to have me as family? I feel your warmth inside me, reassuring, calming.

Warmth surrounds me on the outside too as Yoh wraps his arms around you. "You don't know how often I've wanted you to say those words." He murmured warmly. I stare at him in shock while you flare brightly inside me with happiness, flooding my insides with a deeper warmth than before. "I knew you were hurting, and I tried so hard to reach you, but I couldn't. I'm willing to be your brother, for real now."

Soft murmurs could be heard around the table at Yoh's statement. The rest of his family in particular are not happy about Yoh's easy acceptance of me. But their ire weakens somewhat as I bury my face in Yoh's shoulder, letting my tears seep into his shirt. "It's going to be alright." Yoh whispers soothingly. And somehow I know it is. It sounds crazy, but in that moment I knew that Yoh would make it alright.

You seemed to know, because you slowly let go of me, your warmth seeping out of me. But a warmth stayed in spite of that, Yoh's warmth, his love for me and it filled the space that you left. I couldn't see you, but I could feel you smiling as you faded into the afterglow, whispering one last time

"Merry Christmas."

Wolf: Review please.


	2. Attention!

Attention to all who have favorited this particular story. In a few days time I will be deleting it, but only because I am moving this story to my collection entitled Random Musings: A Oneshot Collection. That is all.


End file.
